The Black Community As The Black Titanic (For Those Who Can't See It)

 

This blog is to help put into perspective the situation within the black community for those who can’t see it. I get plenty of hate mail and after a while it becomes annoying. It never ceases to amaze me how many black people are in DENIAL about the OBVIOUS dysfunctions around us. Today it is not the white man…it’s us! We are our own worst enemy.  I hope this helps…

Setting: The Black Titanic Ship

Starring: All members of the black community (rich, poor, Democrat, Republican, conservative, progressive etc). A list of black leaders and politicians: Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, John Lewis, Maxine Waters, and all others.  

Time: Past & Present day

The Black Titanic has been sailing the Atlantic since the end of the American Civil War. The ship has seen a number of captains beginning with Frederick Douglass. First starting out the ship was STRONG. Many were amazed by its massive size and strength. Black men and black women were marrying and starting families in large numbers. A community began to form. Black businesses were popping up all over the ship. There were banks, newspapers, a black woman with a hair care product, and insurance companies.

Some outsiders resented the newfound freedom of the former black slaves. They started a terrorist organization called the Klu Klux Klan. White pirates would come aboard the ship in the middle of the night in order to cause chaos. This was the first major iceberg to hit the black titanic—RACISM. Lynchings, rape, and beatings took place. Some black businesses were destroyed. Still the ship kept sailing.

A few new captains came along during this time. First there was W.E.B. DuBois, Booker T. Washington and Marcus Garvey. Malcolm X entered the picture along with a black progressive, who would eventfully change the Black Titanic forever, Martin Luther King Jr.

By this time some black people aboard the black titanic became restless/resentful of their place in society, and sought equality outside of the black titanic. These individuals strongly believed that the only way to equality was if we (the black passengers aboard the ship) got off and joined the rest of the world in every sector of society (including interracial marriage). They jumped ship and abandoned a number of prosperous black businesses aboard the black titanic. This was the second iceberg to hit the black titanic—INTREGRATION. 

Unity among black people on the black titanic began to break down. Black people began to separate themselves by class, education, and ideology. Non-blacks were allowed to come aboard the black titanic. Interracial marriages began to pop up more than ever before. Still the black titanic kept sailing with those black people, who vowed to stick around. A number of black industries prospered during this time. Soul Train was on the air. Berry Gordy and Motown were going strong. Black athletes and entertainers came into their own. Then it happened! The third iceberg hit—the captain of the ship, Martin Luther King Jr. was gunned down (years before his co-captain, Malcolm X, was also gunned down). This left the ship badly damaged.

A new captain of the ship stepped forward—Jesse Jackson. Under his leadership came a series of damaging icebergs—WELFARE, ROE V. WADE, GANGS, VOLIENCE, SINGLE MOTHERS, THE SELLING OF BLACK BUSINESSES TO WHITES, AND CRACK COCAINE/DRUGS. With this series of icebergs the black titanic become permanently crippled and many of it’s inhabitants began to worry not only about the welfare of the ship, but the direction of the ship because along the way Jesse Jackson picked up a co-captain—Al Sharpton, a race baiter more blunt and vigorous than any before him.

Under captain Jesse Jackson black fathers were sent to the bottom of the ship and black mothers were given welfare if needed. The black family began to look more and more like a matriarchy. Black women gained the right to kill off their offspring. Planned Parenthood clinics began to pop up all over the ship (along with liquor stores and crack houses). An estimated sixteen million black babies were killed off due to abortion. Tookie Williams and friends became pirates to the ship and gang violence erupted. Drugs invaded the ship with the gangs. Through all this nonsense the captains of the ship assured the passenger that everything was fine. “If anything pops off just use your race care to gain sympathy, respect, and a competitive advantage. Don't ever forget white America owes you...in every way that matters," they said.

Those who began to question the direction of the ship also began planning for what was sure to come. Productive blacks began investing their money, buying land and homes in the suburbs (islands), planning for their children’s education outside the black titanic, securing their preservation by purchasing lifeboats, and separating themselves from the masses aboard the ship. They also openly questioned the leadership of the ship’s captains only to be hit with a harsh backlash from the masses, “You act white. You’re not black enough. You’re a sellout.” So, they decided to keep quiet and wait for the day to come…

That day those productive blacks saw coming is now…present day. The Black Titanic is sinking. The last series of icebergs to hit the ship were—AIDS/STDS, OBESITY, HIP-HOP/RAP MUSIC, A GENDER WAR BETWEEN THE SEXES, AND INDIFFERENCE FROM THOSE OUTSIDE THE BLACK TITANITC TO THE WELFARE OF AFRICAN AMERICANS.

I’m in my lifeboat with friends and family. As we’re paddling away from the black titanic we’re looking back in anger and fascination. Anger because we saw this coming and fascination because it is one hell of a sight to see.

My mother: “Von, maybe we should go back and try to help.”

Me: “Naw…screw that! They should have been investing in lifeboats like us instead of putting their money in weave, cars, rims, and bullshit. They partied right up until the last iceberg caught them off guard. I know they didn’t see that one coming, but it was predictable.”

I’m paddling as hard as I can to try to get away. There are black folks all around us begging for help.

A Drowning Man: “Von…please…please…let me climb aboard your boat.”

Me: “Hell no…If I let you climb aboard every drowning mofo out here is going to want to climb aboard and then you idiots will turn the boat over.”

A Drowning Man: “Please.”

He attempts to grab the side of my boat…rocking it with his weight.

Me: “I said no…asshole. You should have taken your money and invested in a boat instead of those 24 inch rims.”

I stand up and knock him upside the head with the boat paddle. He falls off the boat. We paddle away. Next a single mother, who is holding her young daughter, approaches us.

Single mother: “Please Von save me and my child.”

Me: “I told your ass a long time ago NOT to have a child you couldn’t afford, but you didn’t listen. I told you to take your birth control.”

Single mother: “I know. I was young and he played me. I thought he loved me…so I let him go in raw.”

Me: “Save the sob story for Lucifer, bitch.”

I catch sight of the two captains of the ship. Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, and a flock of black progressives are trying to escape unnoticed. I catch up to them.

Me: “Hey…waiting a minute! How the hell are you progressive blacks going to leave the ship you were driving? You’re supposed to go down with the ship.”

Jesse Jackson: “Now that’s where you’re wrong. We didn’t land on the black titanic. The black titanic landed on us!”

Me: “Yeah it landed on me too, but when those like myself tried to tell you guys that this ship needed to be repaired you either ignored our warning or deflected our issues. If you did acknowledge the issues it was to blame someone else…most commonly white America. The gangs, drugs, violence, single parent homes, piss poor sense of morality and the spreading of STDs could have been prevented if you group of manipulators had taken the time to talk about the problems instead of begging the white man for his table scraps, sympathy, respect and enabling those with these issues. You told the passengers on the ship to use their race whenever possible to get ahead while those like myself tried to encourage them to think for themselves and be more self-sufficient. Now they have nothing to show for their lives on the black titanic.”

Jesse Jackson: “You’re wrong…the white man will be here soon to rescue us all. They wouldn’t dare let the black race die. There would be a backlash around the world.”

Me: “Did you not see how large the LAST iceberg was that hit us? It was INDIFFERENCE from the general public about the plight of African Americans. After years of inciting ‘white guilt’ white America and everyone else has finally said ‘enough of this shit. You Negros are on your own.’”

Maxine Waters: “So what are you saying?”

Me: “I’m saying your damn race card has expired. No one gives a fuck whether the masses live or die. We tried to tell you it was coming…tried to warn you. Now look at you…leaving the scene of the crime with your tail between your legs…yet for years I and those who think like me were called sellouts to our race for trying to get black folks to take responsibility and stand on their own two feet.”

The boat full of progressive blacks look from one to the other.

Al Sharpton: “What do you suggest we do now?”

Me: “It’s too damn late to do anything. You have driven the black community to hell. My crew and I are going to take our food/water/money and sail to our home in the suburbs (our island). I’m guessing you and your crew will sail or try to sail back to America. Without your black nation…what do you have left to live for?”

They look from one to the other once again.

John Lewis: “Barack Obama…we have a black president now. Our hope lies with him.”

I shake damn head and paddle away.

Why Courting Has Gone Out The Window In The Black Community Part 2

I have a FEW theories as to why black men no longer court black women. Here is a list….

• No one taught black men better (papa was either nonexistent or just a whorish son of a bitch himself). Some black men have NEVER witnessed an OLDER black man “woo” a black woman.
• There is a general lack of respect for black women period. The reality is some black men simply view black women as objections not worthy of any type of meaningful affection.
• Many black women have too much baggage for ANY man. Who the hell wants to court a woman who’s going to bring with her a headache?
• The PRODUCTIVE black man shortage has produced a situation of supply and demand. The supply of decent available black men is LOW and the DEMAND is high. They (black men) can be selective and be “dogs” at the same time. It doesn’t really matter because women will still be at their door knocking if they look decent and have money. They have the numbers advantage and they know it. My guess…this is the MAIN reason why we see the role reversal in courtship.
• There is a flock of black men today who love to be pampered and cared for in EVERY way. I think this is due to growing up with single mothers and never seeing a man play his position in the household. The mother took care of EVERYTHING. The son never got to see the role of a man. They grow up to suffer from the “baby boy syndrome” (as I call it) where they expect their woman to replace their mother…with sexual benefits.
• Last and probably the most important: COLLECTIVELY BLACK WOMEN DON’T DEMAND TO BE COURTED ANYMORE.

I could go into detail with this list but I won’t simply because I don’t feel like it! At some point on this blog I have gone over almost everything on the list above. So, if you’re interested in reading my two cents on those issues dig through my archives. For this post I plan to focus my attention on the last bullet because I personally believe it is the ROOT cause of this problem.

Collectively black women don’t demand to be courted anymore…

What do I mean by the above statement? I’m going to be blunt (as usual). I believe African American women are too EASY. We easily let our emotions get the better of our judgment when it comes to men. Some of you can deny it if you like, but the fact remains…we wouldn’t have so many damn single mothers walking around if it were not true. If black women were holding themselves to a higher standard they wouldn’t be single mothers at all. Instead they would be wives! In this day and age I have to imagine it’s pretty easy to pull a black woman because some of us want to be loved so bad by a man that we accept bullshit from a man. He can already be someone’s “baby daddy” or just a bum ass dude, but many of us would welcome him with open arms. This desperation, piss poor sense of traditional family values (children after marriage) and accepting of bullshit has LOWERED the bar for men (particularly black men)…and they know it!

Black men would not be able to come with the bullshit if WE (black women) didn’t allow them to do so. You personally might hold YOURSELF to a HIGH standard, but what about the black woman next to you? She’s eyeing your guy down, waiting for you to fuck up, or simply waiting for you to turn your back. You know in your heart that what YOU won’t do (at least not in the beginning stages of the courting process) SHE will do with pride. Jumpoff, whore, slut, tramp or whatever you want to call HER…YOU know she’s there in the background and HE knows it too. This type of backstabbing has also helped to LOWER the bar for black men. Bottom line: If every black woman had respect for the NEXT black woman and held HERSELF to a higher standard black men would be forced to show RESPECT for black women.

Think about it…

If enough black women were saying, “No sir…if you want to get to know me you better come correct,” black men would have no choice but to fall in line. This type of thinking is ineffective if only a handful of black women live by it. It would take a collective effort on the part of black women to turn this situation around. This is why I believe a modern day black feminism movement is needed…fuck what a hater to say. Unity among black women is the ONLY answer. Black women need to form some type of unity in order to remedy and address problems like this one. I guarantee if black women came together and said, “We’re not accepting this shit anymore,” things would change for the better.

I know some people reading this will say “Von, it’s because black fathers are not around anymore or not in the home anymore,” and this is true. Back in the day when black fathers were in the home (and the black community was patriarchal) black boys/young men had to come correct if they wanted to get close to someone’s daughter. That meant going to the young lady’s house and meeting her parents before taking her out. The young man not only had to win over the daughter, but he also had to win over the whole family. Those days are LONG gone…and I don’t think they’re coming back (at least not like before). I’m lucky enough to have grown up in one of these households and I’m grateful for it.

If we are to blame the absence of black fathers for this problem are they to be blamed for the courting issues of both black boys and black girls? By this I mean are black fathers to be blamed for black boys not knowing how to treat women and black girls not knowing how to carry themselves around men? My honest answer is NO! I believe the standards women hold for themselves come from their mother. If a young girl grew up seeing her mother display low standards in men what is she to grow up to do? Do hoes raise hoes? We seriously need to take a look at the individuals raising young black women who in turn grow up to feel it’s perfectly okay to be cut buddies and friend with benefits. Nine times out of ten I bet their “mother” wasn’t a mother like my mother, who would beat the shit out of me for being anything less than a lady around a man.

Our primary guidance into womanhood is our mother…not our father. It is she who is the teacher of morality and code of conduct for a young girl. Most often mothers lead by example (a scary thought considering what I see from black mothers today).

“But Von…how can black women learn how to treat men if their father isn’t there?”

Again this falls on the mother…not the father.  The only thing my father taught me as far as boys go was how to recognize a DOG. He didn’t teach me how to treat a man (there is something sickening about the idea of a father teaching a daughter this type of shit). He didn’t teach me how carry myself like a lady. He simply taught me how to recognize a flawed man. I watched how my mother treated my father growing up. I’m sure other young girls watched this too. Unfortunately, I think those who have fucked up relationships with men probably watched their mothers in similar situations.

Anyway, I think I’m rambling. I’m going to cut this blog short. Sorry for the wait…I’m a busy woman these days. Any thoughts?
 

Black People...What Happened???

Today we see what has happened to the black hair care/beauty industry.  Did you notice that in almost EVERY ultra sheen/afro sheen commercial there was a BLACK MAN complimenting the beauty of a BLACK WOMAN?  Did you notice how we were PORTRAYED in those BLACK commercials? Have you ever noticed how the old black beauty products typically featured both a BLACK MAN and a BLACK WOMAN in the advertising??? We can't get that shit today. Why? Because the black beauty industry doesn't belong to us anymore. Links...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_E._Johnson,_Sr.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johnson_Products_Company 

More commercials....

Why Courting Has Gone Out The Window In The Black Community Part 1

My next blog will be my opinion on this HUGE ISSUE. I found this comment on Essence.com. For the most part I think it's on point. Any thoughts?

The tide has turned, as Errick and other men have pointed out. As he so clearly stated, men don't seem to be looking for what they can do for a woman; what the woman can do for them is paramount. The Superman who will prioritize your needs over his is a myth of bygone days, like the Loch Ness monster or unicorns. 

Men (even men who bring less to the table than the woman; even men who bring nothing to the table but an appetite, and even men who come to the table with their own tupperware to restock their own fridges) aren't havin' it, because you're supposed to be the one falling all over him as he considers himself the prize, and if you don't and won't, a boatload of other attractive, educated women of means and property will, since women have taken to undercutting ourselves like day-laborers.